This week's book is Alison Bechdel's Fun Home: A Family Tragicomic. It's a graphic novel, but that doesn't change the fact that it is a worthwhile read.
Alison Bechdel, the writer and illustrator of "Dyke's to Watch Out For," paints the story of her childhood, more specifically the relationship between herself and her father, while using her childhood home as a frame. She writes in a liner and yet non-liner fashion. Some chapters start at the beginning of one point and then end, while other are turned inside out starting at the end, returning to the beginning and then continuing on back to the end. The result is a beautiful, honest and painful autobiography.
Alison narrates the story as an adult giving new insight into her childhood relationships. It is by no means a fun or easy story to read, as there are clear and painful scars that she carries, but it is an insightful tale of a girl growing up with a closeted and abusive father and becoming a woman who comes to terms with her own sexuality.
It is an important book because it unflinchingly looks at issues many wish childhood didn't include such as sexuality, gender restraints, masturbation, abuse and suicide. Even more importantly it examins the ways we begin to realise as we grow up that our parents are people and have lives and feelings we can not comprehend. Alison Bechdel exposes her difficult childhood and it is a potent reminder that childhood isn't anything like how we depict it. That it is a difficult and scary time, but it is also the time that helped us to become who we are.
This book is a definite read, despite all the sadness it leaves you with the positive message that you will overcome all this, and you will be better for it.
Because a little literature can go a long way I will be posting a review of an awesome book every Friday.
This week's book is "Pink Brain, Blue Brain: How Small Differences Grow Into Troublesome Gaps And What We Can Do About It" by neuroscientist Lise Eliot.It's a non-fiction book that explores, and disproves, the science of proving gender exists naturally. The chapters are separated by childhood development, starting at birth and finishing at teenage hood.
It would have been enough for Eliot to simply disprove the studies or expose the misinformation, but she takes it a step further. At the end of every chapter is a break-down of how you as a parent or teacher can actually work to help children develop without the constraints of genderization.My favorite example of this is in the beginning chapters of the book where Eliot exposes the myth that gender can be effected through superficial means, such as toys or clothes. She gives the example of giving dolls to boys and trucks to girls. She points out that this method is doomed from the start because it doesn't address the real problem. Worst it often leads parents to believe that gender is natural.Instead of simply swapping genderized items, Eliot suggests that parents should first focus on what each sex lacks due to gender constraints. For example she points out that girls rarely get to develop their spacial abilities while boys rarely get to develop their nurturing abilities. If a parent really wanted to help their children overcome gender barriers they would instead give their girls building toys, like Lego or K'Nex, and allow their boys to care for a small animal.At times with Eliot's scientific approach to the source material the chapters can seem overwhelming. However, it is well worth giving this book a read through. I found that while I may not always understand the studies she discuses in the chapters, there is more than enough information and instruction at the end of each chapter to make up for it.If you are a parent, teacher, gender studies student, or you just care about breaking gender barriers, Lise Eliot's "Pink Brain, Blue Brain" is read worth picking up.
As I begin the move from university grad to full-fledged adult, i.e. getting a job, I have been inundated with advice from my parents. Sometimes the advice comes when I'm only looking for support. But most of the time it comes when I'm discussing strategies. I think like all parents, mine give advice in the sort of way that brooks no argument. Of course they are right, they're parents. The thing is when you become an adult you start to realize that maybe your parents aren't the font of wisdom they think they are.I clearly remember letting my Dad look over my first university paper. It took a ton of work and he said it was definitely an A. So then you can imagine my utter (and inevitable) disappointment when I received a big fat C.At first all I could think was "but my Dad said it was an A!" I then stared to realize that parents are people, and people have opinions, and opinions should not be treated as facts. Now my father is a history professor so it wasn't like he didn't have the credentials to mark a paper. He's constantly marking student papers while writing his own. I figured he would be a great judge of what would take to write a great paper. But he was in history where I was in English and Visual Arts, and it really came down to he didn't know what my professors were looking for.And really that is where most of the bad advice from my parents comes from, they don't know anything about the field I'm in. My parents are both well educated professionals, but neither of them knows the first thing about grant applications or how a theatre union works. While I realize that there are certain things that can be applied to any job hunt I would never presume to tell a engineering grad or a psychology grad how to look for a job or apply for a job specific to their career.It may surprise you to know (because I was surprised when I found out) that almost every career track has its own way of doing things, from everything up to and including the resume. Actually the resume is a good example of what I am talking about. The resume format that is commonly taught is the general business model. It's good for everything from McDonald's fry cook to general office assistant, however once you start thinking of a specific career like theatre tech or graphic artist things get a lot different. Google "theatre tech CV" or "graphic artist resume" you'll see what I'm talking about. Resumes are tailored to each area. So what works for one won't work for all, but when you have parents who know nothing about your career track it's makes the advice you're getting even more confusing.Case and point. In live production (well any place really) who you know will get you in to a job for which you might otherwise be passed over. But you have to let the employer know who you know. In my Mom's line of work you don't write it, you call after you send your cover letter and resume to let the employer know. I almost lost out on a job because I took my Mom's advice on this. In live production you just out and say, in your cover letter, "Bob Thompson said you were looking." But she didn't know that and neither did I, because I wasn't asking the people in my field for advice. Now I always check with someone in my field if I am unsure of what to do, but it doesn't make it easier to tell my parents they don't know what they are talking about.I think this is because your whole life they have been an unquestionable authority. And it's worked until adulthood because you aren't doing anything outside of their knowledge zone. But when you become an adult and take a career path they are totally unfamiliar with, suddenly their advice seems foisted upon you, without your consent. Failure to follow their advice will ultimately lead to sighs about "if only you had listened." It makes you want to scream, "No, you need to listen! Your advice doesn't help for this type of job!"Parental advice isn't useless, if you are entering a similar job market. However, when you're going where they've never even thought of before, you’re pretty much on your own.
